Questions to unlock your Mum or Dad’s life story

Thirty-five questions that get past “fine” and “I can’t remember”, and into the stories you have never heard.

How to use these

Don’t work through them like a list. Pick one, ask it properly, and let the answer wander. The best stories usually arrive three or four questions after the one you asked.

If you are doing this over the phone or on a visit, two or three is plenty for one sitting.

Start here: ten to get you going

  • 1What is one of your earliest memories?
  • 2What were you like as a child, well-behaved or a little bit of trouble?
  • 3What does the word ‘family’ mean to you?
  • 4What was your Mum like when you were young? And your Dad?
  • 5When did you first fall in love?
  • 6How did you meet your husband, wife or partner, and when did you know?
  • 7What do you remember about the day you became a parent?
  • 8What is the funniest thing that has ever happened to you?
  • 9What advice would you give your 20-year-old self?
  • 10How would you most like to be remembered?

More questions, by chapter of life

Childhood and growing up

  • Which birthday from your childhood do you remember most, and why?
  • Did you have a nickname growing up? What is the story behind it?
  • How is life different today from when you were a child?

Family and roots

  • Tell me about your grandparents. What did you love most about them?
  • What is a story an older relative told you that you have never forgotten?
  • What advice from your parents do you wish you had taken?

School days

  • Did you enjoy school? What kind of pupil were you?
  • What are your best, and worst, memories from your school days?

Love and relationships

  • Describe one of the most romantic moments of your life.
  • What do you think are the secrets to a happy relationship?
  • What was your wedding day like? Tell me the story.

Becoming a parent

  • What are your favourite memories of each of your children growing up?
  • What is the most important thing being a parent taught you?

Friendships

  • Tell me about a friendship that has meant the most to you.
  • What do you remember about making your very first friend?

Work and career

  • What do you remember about your very first job?
  • Do you have a favourite story from your working life?

Travel and holidays

  • What was your first trip abroad?
  • What is the most memorable meal you have ever eaten, and where?

Life, lessons and legacy

  • When in your life have you been happiest, and why?
  • What experience made you most resilient?
  • Did you live through a moment of history? Where were you?

And a few just for fun

  • If you could invite any three people, living or not, to dinner, who and why?
  • What is your go-to story, the one you love telling again and again?
  • What is something about you that would surprise us?

What this can become

Their answers, in their own words, gathered into a proper hardback book that sits on a shelf and gets passed down.

A YourStory hardback open at a page spread A finished YourStory hardback beside an open spread Pages from a finished YourStory life story book
Alyson, co-founder of YourStory

I’m Alyson. I put these together from the questions that actually work, the ones that get a real answer instead of a one-word one. If you never get past the first ten, that is still an afternoon well spent, and you will hear something you did not know.

Alyson xCo-founder, YourStory

We can do the asking for you

We email one question a week. They reply, we gather the answers and the photos, and it comes back as a premium hardback, nearly A4, printed in the UK.

Start their book £149, one purchase, no subscription.